Since 2007 I have been in a wormhole of discovery about the world and myself. Prior to that year, I was pretty tuned out of anything except my desire to make music and party. After that year, I feel as if I was pulled along by the Zeitgeist and it's many evolutions. I really did let it teach me a great many things about how little we know about the natural and social environments that shape us.
In 2007, I began creating my first film which was flush with conspiracies and fantasies about a monumental spiritual awakening around 2012. I was transfixed by the closeness of the date. The possibility that miraculous things can happen for the better gripped me in a social seduction. That's the zeitgeist (spirit of the times). Society seduces you to think like the group and experience it's meaning and mood. To live under its story.
I did. That was me every year of my life before 2007 and then it all changed. And from 2007 to 2025, precisely one hour ago on February 19, I was in another social seduction. One of skepticism of every story, every person's motives, and every thought of my own. What this process taught me was that even my own spontaneous thoughts cannot be trusted without a process of discernment.
So the wormhole I was in for the past 18 years helped me realize that pretty much everyone lies at some point in some way, even if only to spare other's from the truth. But I've come to notice this morning, a whole new side of myself that I myself could not see. Today my first true legal issue from a mistake I made in the past got brought to my attention and I instantly could feel the world from this lawyer I spoke with. He was nice, just doing his job and put it to me squarely. One of my past blogs used a picture that I did not have the rights to use.
So I began scouring my blog and all the titles and noticed a trend. I can see how the rest of the world, who isn't as skeptical and "on the hunt" for deep cosmic truths as myself, would see me. The "Conspiracy Positive Consciousness Kymatica guy".
"Who am I?" I muttered to myself. "Is this the height of what I've become thanks to this wormhole?" It did spark a career and lead me on the path to my 2025 self. I quite like the life I've built. But I guess it was the process of seeing who I've become through the eyes of an outsider that helped me see the limitations I placed on my connection with society, and with my rapidly approaching future self. I want that future me to have softened and grown into himself with grace.
Let's hope the same for all of us. For all those we love. For all those we don't. I do believe, whether we admit it to ourselves or not, that is the world we truly wish to inhabit.
Hoka Hey!